Day 5: On Sunday, I hit rock-bottom. After spending a few quality moments writing in my blog, I noticed a sound ? a familiar sound. What was it? So quiet, like distant voices and music. It sounded just like... like my neighbors were watching the Simpsons!

Slowly, quietly, I pressed my ear to the floor and for several blissful minutes, I listened to the muffled back-and-forth dialog and occasional "doh". Eventually Jean-Luc and Deanna brought me back to my senses. When I'm in a tough spot, I know which sock puppets I can count on.

Unfortunately, the Wesley sock has vanished. I can only assume that he's travelling in another dimension somewhere. Either that or he's in the wash.

Once you reach bottom, as Deanna says, it can only get better from there. At least I think that's what she said. At the time, she and the Riker sock were in the hot tub ? well, my kitchen sink, actually ? and she got a little distracted halfway through what she was saying. I'm okay about that. I mean, she wasn't my type anyway. I prefer something in wool.